No word

I once asked myself, what would I do, how would I feel, if I received no encouragement, no word from him on the day of the concert?
It's now the morning of the concert day and I don't think I'll receive anything later on. I don't know how I'll feel later. I know I feel quite terrible now. Even from the first day of knowing him, I've never felt so far from him before. I guess it's relative. And it's all my fault. Always my fault. Hardly have the courage to even leave a comment anymore. None of my usual candor in those. Just... *shrug*. I can't explain. Ah well, what can I do? What can I do?

I wish, I wish...
I wish I may, I wish I might...
give me the chance to be his friend again.