-Valentine's Day -

I'm a very selfish person. Expect to receive, but not to give.
Then I realize that to give I must truly want to give, from the bottom of my heart. That's why I give so little, because I never wanted to truly give.

So I guess it's over. It's kind of a relief because I've been pushing myself to find back that feeling I once had for him. I don't know why it isn't there. Maybe because all that physical intimacy just took my feelings away or maybe we're just not for each other. In any case I admit to myself that I don't have the feelings anymore and I feel better immediately. Like he said, don't force myself to find back that feeling, if it is there, it will come to me. Truthfully, I'm quite unwilling to let it go, but if I don't it will only be worse for both of us. Like I once said, why lie to myself? Alright, I shouldn't think too much because I might just start regretting and think that the truth is something else again.

I'm really very sorry, SH. It's kind of funny that special days that we spend together always have to end on a sad note.
Maybe now my earlier post would make more sense.
Haha, it ended before it started and it has to be on Valentine's Day.