Selfishness - I before You
Mum fell down the MRT stairs today (8th Feb, Wednesday) on the way to work. Extreme embarrassment aside, the thing that struck me was that only a single young woman in her 20s asked if she was alright. I wasn't at the scene, but according to mum, the others only stared at her and none offered to help except for that young woman. It's kind of disappointing really. I wonder what went through the minds of those people. Don't think they were that cold-hearted, probably saw that my mum could still walk (although the fall was pretty terrible and her shin and knees were cut and bleeding) and already had a lady fussing over her so did not see the need to step forward.
Despite that, it is still pretty disturbing.
Did they think "Damn, why did that woman fall? I'm going to lose my place in front of the door of the train if I go forward to help her and shall lose my chance of getting a seat on the train. Ah! That lady is helping her!" And then continues to stare at a spot on the transparent glass doors.
How many of us would actually think that way or along those lines? Or did the thought "Let someone else help" pass through our minds? I am guilty of it. In Psychology, there is this process which a person's mind goes through in order to decide whether to help a person in need. One of the factors include the number of people around or something like that, where the more people are around, the less responsibility a person would take upon him/herself to help that person.
Migratory birds fly in that V-formation. Is it only some or is it all?
Anyway they fly in that formation because it makes it easier for them to cover long distances and the updrafts allows them to saves energy, enabling them to cover distances longer than if they had travelled alone. Something along those lines.
Even birds help each other by travelling in a group, why didn't the people at the MRT station help my mum?
Ok, not a very good analogy, but you get the point. Do people become more selfish as we grow older? I feel so. I feel that I'm more selfish now than before. To put oneself before others. Not good, not good. Would you teach your child to think of him/herself first? Always grab the best for him/herself before giving his/her friends what's left? If there is no generosity and too much of selfishness... Perhaps that's how the world turned out the way it is.
posted by tstar @ 12:39 AM
3 comments
3 Comments:
i agree with u..for eg, u dun find stories of k1 or k2 kids backstabbing each other..but more of pri 4 and above ba..(@ least for what i encounter)
I still think that ppl backstab cos they are selfish and wants the benefits for themselves.
As the saying goes, "survival of the fittest"
A sad world.
is it something to do with moral courage? What I think is, moral courage is to have the courage to do what is morally right.
The law doesn't dictate people to give seat to the needy, we are not legally condemned if we don't help someone in trouble, etc etc... technically we can't fault someone for not offering his/her seat to a pregnant woman. Technically they are not obliged to do so.
On the other hand, a person's moral upbringing does tell whether he/she should do what is morally right. Something like good karma?
I dunno, like I always say human beings are self-serving. It is quite contradicting. We are always taught that we must take care of ourselves before bothering about others, such as if we can't swim, why should we jump into the sea to save a drowning person... etc...
Inside the heart actually many people would want to help, but they scare that if they offer help they would appear like oddballs. Everyone thinks the same and so noone does anything.
I know how pissing it is when people have that "watch-show" mentality... really want to splash water onto their face.
As for the migratory birds, yup it has got to do with aerodynamics. Every bird will take turn to take the position at the tip of the flying V, something like group before self? Or all for one and one for all?
And humans are supposed to be complex animals..
More of all for one and one for all.. That's the phrase I was looking for. And yup, JY, I guess in this world it's kind of difficult to cultivate a one for all and all for one attitude because we are taught in little ways that we must strive to be the best. I realize that nowadays there is a lot of emphsis on taking note of the people around you because they are the ones who help you, but most of the time I guess people forget and concentrate on their success.
Sometimes simplicity works best. Maybe we are too complex?? Complex until selfish, until we're kind of stupid, aren't we... hehz...
Yup, we're not technically obliged to help others, but majority of people don't think of the word "technically". Reminds me of that bus 96 and NUS student case where the student also talked about "not obliged to give up seat". Morality is so strongly ingrained into the average person that not to give up a seat to somebody who needs it is seen as just plainly wrong. I'm quite proud to say that I'm the average person because to me, it IS wrong not to help those who are in need in whatever little ways that we can.
Anyway, see how the average person on the street thinks differently from the average university student? Use of the word "technically"...
I still don't like how the word
"technically" is used in this case. Kind of sad to think that some people use this as an excuse instead of just simply saying that they don't want to help.
Yes, who wants to be the oddball? But then I realized that most of the time, it is easier to help others and be at ease with yourself than to stand aside and then feel guilty about it later on. Ok, I think I'm an oddball... haha... most people find it easier to stand aside.. Actually it is just that first step that we need to take to overcome that embarrassment at being noticed, after that it becomes a hell lot easier. Then I guess one will start concentrating on making oneself feel at ease wif him/herself... hehz.. (sometimes it is nice to be vocal and be noticed.)
As for wanting to splash water in their faces, you have your water bottle... =p
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